Bila aku fikir balik, lagi few months aku genap 19 tahun. Hello, rasa mcm baru semalam jadi 14. Mcm baru semalam lap hingus dkt lengan baju, bila balik Mak ngamuk. Rasa mcm baru semalam aku daftar masuk SSI. Cemburu sungguh masa pada aku. Semua benda berubah. MashaAllah..
Aku berubah tak?
Better or worse? Worse, I think. Allah Maha Penyayang je yang jaga my behind the scenes sins.. I mean, semua org dijaga oleh Dia. I bet kalau Dia kejam, semua org pun malu dgn perangai sendiri sbb semua live showing dkt dahi. Tapi Dia cover baikkk punya kita punya aib. MashaAllah..
Tahun ni tahun terakhir umur aku start dgn digit "1". So sentimental. Bolehkah aku dilabel dewasa lepasni? Tak. Nak. Aku nak jadi kanak2! Sigh. Ah, umur dah 19 pun kdg2 perangai mcm kanak2 HAHA! Aku rasa berperangai kanak2 tak menunjukkan aku ni worse than anyone and those who act all matured aren't any better :p
menulis benda takde motipppppp!
Aku takda mood dah nk blogging. Sometimes, I blog virtually in my brain.. Let only myself and Allah know. You know, knowing too much can get you hurt. Letting people know too much, hurts the same. I'd rather compile everything in pieces of random papers and ripped them all, let the pain fades..
There ain't much to share. I don't know where to start, how to start. Cuma lately ni bila aku baring bergolek atas katil dkt asrama and thinking what am I lacking of that made me so different from others (while others are improving and I am not), I came to the idea of how things continue to change but yet, I remain the same.
Am I still the same nesa?
The lazy bum..
Growing up sucks. The best thing about growing is the notorious liberation, they say. Puiiii, not literally.. Mak, Ayah and Zauji are still in hesitation to give me green light at certain crazy things I wanna do. Am I whining? Kinda. Well, this post is rather I-want-to-fill-my-free-time post. Everything is random.
Bila aku sedar yg everyone is doing good in study, I asked myself "Kau hadoooooo???"..
Oh my goodness. I have nothing to represent myself at its best and I'm 19!! (well, almost..)
19 years of living and still searching my pace. Will everything work well by time? Not sure though.. I'm not even in university yet -___-" Okay, this is real whining session HAHA!
Talking about changes, not all changes can be alter back to how it used to be, you know. Like when a person change, there's absolutely nothing you can do about it. Saddening isn't it? When everything has change, there's only a thing that remain.. For all I know, it is He whose power over all.
At this age, I watched people around me paving to success tremendously flabbergasting. When I looked at those kids who got the chance to travel at young age, tasting the different cultures all over the world just for the sake of seeking knowledge in the name of Him and getting the precious scroll, I envy.
One way to coax myself..
God knows better and this is my way.
Again, redha takes control.
Mungkin aku selalu question orang lain hebat etc and what am I doing? Idk..
But I enjoy watching these people, at least, there are things that had my mind opened.
CUT. ALL. THESE. CRAPS.
Those are random idiocy of my unstable hormone.
It's the time of the month, peeps.
Aku bosan sebenarnya ni. Rasa nak tidur je, tapi tidur pun bosan, Tgn aku dah sakit asyik scroll IG je. Ya Allah, manusia ni mmg tak reti bersyukur kan? -___-" masa kelas berderet, aku duk tunggu cuti. Ini dah cuti tak tahu nk buat apa pulak. Bagus sgt lah tu. Yg lain dlm rumah ni tak memberi bantuan utk menghilangkan bosan sbb semua mcm ada benda nk buat. Heh..
Kalau pegi hiking pun best gak skrg ni. Bosannya duduk rumah menghadap IG, youtube etc.. I need to get out from this house!!! Hiking anyone?
Aku tak tau nak blog apa. Dah jarang sangat blog. Selalu duk layan termenung je sampai tak terblog dah. Sampai lupa aku ada blog rupanya and once active here, long time ago lah... haha!
aku rasa umur 23 tu mmg betul2 raw nak masuk adulthood.
Dgn degree yg nak bakal habis mid July ni, aku akan masuk alam pekerjaan dan struggle menjadi hamba sistem. Gitu.
Hello kerja pun belum tentu dapat terus. Semoga rezeki aku tak putus lepasni.
Last year, turning 22 taught me :
1. to always double check stuffs.
2. to never trust that someone is reliable enough to handle things for you hahahaha
3. remember that things are constantly changing, so dont get fixated so easily
4. believe in the power of doa and staying true to yr effort
5. give a few seconds for yrself to pause then react to a problem
Being 22 last year was the best.
I went to Beijing, Istanbul, Bursa, Mekkah and Madinah all in one year.
بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم Pictures taken using Lenovo A516 and Samsung S2.
We went to check on Kolej Tun Mutahir after we knew that the registration was postponed to Aug 6. It's a 10-storey apartment, 5-10mins walk to the campus. The apartment was empty because they are installing the new facilities at this moment. The condition wasn't really clean, I was quite intimidated and I hope they'll clean it up (ko pikir ko princess ke nisa??)
Just a little tour before this becomes my second home.
Aku decide starting 2018 ni aku nak tukar daripada blogpost kepada Tumblr, sebab apps Tumblr lagi user friendly, hence senang aku nak update di mana-mana. Apps blogger agak lousy. I forgot that I actually created and posted things on Tumblr account since 2015 rupanya haha. See you guys on Tumblr ok!
I wont be blogging here anymore, I guess. Ah sedih pulak rasa........
Aku bukan penulis yg proper because whatever is in this blog is directly (very raw) from my brain, no filtering needed. But I enjoyed 10 years of blogging. Years of freedom (especially when malaysian are very lazy to read, I get more privacy). Thank you for the 10 years of support my loyal (maybe non existent) readers. I love you all of you. It's time to say good bye...cant believe Im doing this....
I bid farewell to blogspot.
Good bye blogging life :(
10 tahun di Shah Alam pun menyeronokkan. Ofcourse ada pahit getir, tapi I surviv…