Oh Cita-Cita...

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم 

(mcm biasa) POST YG PNJG.
(Jgn ckp aku tak warn)

Biasa kalau orang tanya apa aku nak jadi sebenarnya, jarang teramat sgt aku nak jawab jujur. Sebab aku mcm certain people, yang malu nak ckp cita-cita sebenar. Aku rasa bila cita-cita aku diperkecilkan orang lain (even family sendiri), aku jadi tak yakin. Even until skrg pun. Kalau orang tanya apa aku nak jadi sebenarnya, aku malas nak jwb, tapi aku nak cite dkt post ni.

Iran Air stewardesses
So since result UPU dah keluar, aku duk fikir apa aku nak jadi in future. I’ll be taking International Bussiness at UiTM MCC, aku rasa most people would think oh I’d go for the business field.

Sem 2 dkt matrics, aku ada la business tudung custom made. Sambutan memuaskan alhamdulillah but as you know bussiness memerlukan komitmen tinggi, so aku malas and I stopped.

These days aku terfikir, if aku tak start business sendiri, aku kerja dgn orang. Aku dah aim company mana aku nak apply. Tp the thought of starting my own business pun power gak. Esp my own clothing line (mainstream nak mampus). Mungkin kalau Allah izin kan dan bg petunjuk, aku sambung balik. Maybe masa tu dh ada modal besar sikit, boleh keluar mcm-mcm produk. Mungkin. I don’t know.

Berbalik kpd title, sebenarnya aku nak kerja dkt medical/aviation field. I’ve always wanted to be a doctor since tadika and a pilot every since 2009. Kalau ikut minda optimist aku, blh je lepas grad IB, aku buat 2nd degree in medicine, or daftar pilot school. But that sounds absurd for now hahaha.

Royal Brunei Airlines stewardesses
Tapi still, aku nak try. At least ah kan, blh jd business consultant at private hospital or airline company. As you know, business ni mmg everywhere. Even if I cant be a medical doctor, I can always be a PhD doctorate. Mungkin. Dr Siti Nur Anisah, oh so fancy…
Kepala hotak aku masih tk leh nak static lg bab cita-cita ni. Gila, dah 20 kot. Tapi aku belajar satu benda drpd habit cuba-jd-optimist ni. Tukar-tukar ambition tak bermaksud kau gagal dlm menentukan apa yg kau nak kejar sebenarnya. Kau gagal bila kau gagal mencuba utk approach either one of the ambitions dan kau juga boleh dikata gagal jika tak put commitment to it.

Tukar-tukar ambitions mungkin kelihatan takde pendirian, tapi sebenarnya kau kena fhm, takda benda yg boleh jamin life works the way you wanted it to be. So tukar-tukar ambition bukan salah. Salah adalah apabila kau berhenti cuba, apatah lagi berhenti bercita-cita. (Thanks to matrics life, I learnt this from there)

Aku harap sgt in few years time, after Khazanah dah amek alih MAS, depa tukar uniform stewardess tu mcm stewardess Iran Air, Royal Brunei, Brunei Airlines dan other airlines yg FA depa pakai syariah-compliant uniform.

Why I hope for such thing to happen? Because aku nak apply. Betul ckp ni beb. If you know me since 2009, you’d probably remember I used to be so freaking eager to be a pilot that my Myspace name was entitled Miss Stunning Pilot (narcis tahap dewa hahaha) dan kalau kau perasan, thumbnail BOLD&SEPET ni gmbr kapal terbang. That picture never changed since 2009, living proof that I still carry that ambition until today, for those who noticed.

via phone

via pc browser


Kdg-kdg ambition kita drpd kecik mmg tak jd kenyataan dgn senang mcm orang lain, mungkin sebab Allah nak kita lalui jln lain dulu sebelum kita jumpa jln kpd cita-cita asal kita tu. Mungkin jalan yg lain tu adalah jalan yg akan membentuk peribadi, akhlak dan adab kita. Itu lebih baik. Walaupun memakan masa bertahun-tahun.

Kalau aku tak sambung business tudung, business apa aku nak buat pun aku tak pasti lagi. Ini future, bukan benda buat main. Aku takda idea, aku harap Allah bg idea yg suit dgn aku.

Kalau lah one day nanti, aku diberi keizinan utk apply jd FA dan aku dapat, perhaps I’ll drop everything and go for it. Buat apa nak tunggu. Tp ye lah, life is unpredictable. If in future Allah izin kan aku jd FA, aku harap keluarga dan (mungkin) potential-husband aku redha dgn childhood ambition aku tu.


Iran Air Stewardess

Iran Air also


Tapi tak dinafikan takdir yg aku baru je terima (UiTM) is a destiny yg aku harus carry with honour because I have alwaysssss wanted to be in uni. I think it is important for teenager to get a proper education. Not that it is guaranteed that we’d ended up being a businesswoman if we do business degree or engineer if we do engineering, but seeking knowledge at university actually helped us to develop discipline and adab.

 It also help us to appreciate time by seeking knowledge. You know, making sure that your grades are good is a commitment by time, right? So that's why being a university is more than constructing your future-self as accordance to the course that you currently or will be enrolling. Really guys, it's more than that.

True enough, degree life could be like matrics life. It had taught me to be a better person with all the good people Allah sent to me. In sha Allah I will seize this chance.

As for now, aku ada 3 benda utk focus. Degree, saving and discipline. I hope Allah will lead me to be a better Anisah.

Laahaulawala quwatailla billah.

Love,
Esah yg future nya masih tak kelihatan.

Have a nice day! ♥
PS : Trip Aussie 2015 macam kena postpone je? :(

Comments

Syahirah said…
Aku perasan yg thumbnail tu weh!
And I will pray for your good life. And for myself too. Love you Neesa! :*
Nesayang said…
*kesat air mata*
hahahaha terharu siot! dh lama gila thumbnail tu, kdg2 aku sendiri lupa hahaha thank you, syhrh! in sha Allah kita berjaya sooner! Love you more, buddy! :)

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