Sesak

Antara benda2 yg sesak kepala aku adalah : 1. repetitive mistake 2. not knowing the right timing when the decision is logically all on me

dia punya sesak tu tahap aku rasa mcm aku nak tidur selama seminggu atau pakai earphone dan dengar lagu2 favorite sambil ignore semua orang. Aku ada tendency utk ignore people sejak kebelakangan ni and idk what have I done that all these people still stay. All I know is all praise be to Allah.

Byk benda dalam hidup ni memang memerlukan aku utk buat keputusan. Cthnya, samada utk teruskan atau berhenti. Keputusan2 macam ni buat aku rasa terjejas sikit kdg2. I could potentially lose my common sense. Hahaha

Annoying tau bila aku dah cuba tak repeat that mistake, tapi aku repeat lagi. Seolah-olah aku kalah lagi dan lagi while I had the chance to win, like I was too closed to win. Annoying shit. Ada masa aku pejam mata, aku mentally paused everything and virtually slit my throat as I recall those mistakes I made.
Aku faham, kita tak leh lari dr buat silap. Buat silap tu benda normal yg kita kena belajar terima DAN improve. Tp kalau asyik sama je hasilnya, aku boleh lose hope nak cuba hahaha. Penat bodoh.

Tapi tu lah, bukan selamanya langit tu akan gelap dan berat menampung air hujan. Ada hari langit akan terang dan menenangkan. Jadi, your fucked up situations and mistakes dont stay. It evolves and changes.

but timing, sometimes it sucks big time. 

SIGH.