On being a parent

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم 
Peace be upon Prophet Muhammad, his companions and family :)


Yesterday was a day I learnt about parenthood.
It was as if Allah was teaching me indirectly about parenthood.
Whole my life, I always think my parents are perfect.
Every opinion from them is legit and applicable as my preference.
As my stance. I mean, their opinion made me think life is as what they opinionated.
If they indirectly scold me with ABCD, then I would think life is like ABCD.
Senang cite, gua mcm takda pendirian sendiri.
Aku tak pasti aku ni tak cukup exploring ke fikir ke apa.

My aunt once said "kau ni hidup dlm shadow mak ayah kau la"..
She's a psychologist. Hence, I think she has a point.

I think, as you grow up, you gotta have stance.
Stance is like a mental posture, your own point of view.
In malay, pendirian.

My mom always said "people without stance won't succeed".
My dad says "attitude is veryyyyyyyy important no matter who you are"

Juggling between these two, I found myself bewildered.
I am slowly learning what is a good attitude.
Thank you Allah for sending me off to KMS.
I learn about attitude in KMS.

But stance is another thing.

One thing I know is, how am I doing, the way I think, the way I react, the way I work etc will eventually be followed by my children.

I AM SO SCREWED!!
I have 6 years (minimum) before my first child is inside my womb.
You think this is nothing?? You think this is poyo?
Sigh.

I often observe adult and wonder how were they like when they were my age.
Some might had rough patch and change. 

The way they think, talk, work influenced their children.
I always observed my friends who have manners, good grades, good skills, good sense of humor and sense of acceptance.
I wonder how their parents and their in-house communication.
How their parents teach them, talk to them, console them, be their friend etc.
That's a journey, you know.

I will go on that journey.
It starts now.

The way I react etc will affect someone, generally.
That's why they say parenthood is a big chunk of duty yooo!

Hm wait,
Ada ke 19y/o fikir this shit?
HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Mayve I should. I dont want to screw up things in future.
My children should have the most awesome mommy.
:)

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