For Girls. Finding the one and only.

بسم الله الرحمن الرحيم  again, post ni berjela panjang nk mampos. jgn ckp aku tak warn. read under yr own risk.
Ini utk girls (boys nk join pun boleh) yg : - dah lupa mcm mana nk bercinta - tak pernah bercinta - going through hard times with yr other half - saje nk tau apa aku rasa yg a girl patut fikir elok2 before she becomes somebody's wife
Mungkin points aku cliche but kau mungkin lupa little things yg penting dlm relationship. You are so full of yourself, too self-centered. I list down the characteristics, you improvise. I write down my mistakes and the lessons, you reflect. This is applicable for both lelaki dan perempuan, tapi aku tuju kan specific utk girls. Ini utk nak cari husband please. Boyfriend pun boleh, tapi aku taknak bertanggungjawab haha.
1. Jgn memilih rupa.  Mistake : There was a time I felt like Im not interested with him sbb dia tak handsome. So I reject him. Bodoh. Bangang. Sbb lepastu aku realize he has such a kind heart, kinder than the other guy yg aku rasa handsome sgt tu. Mmg padan muka aku beb.
Lesson : Pilih rupa takpa, jgn memilih. Baca balik, hadam dlm otak. After a while, aku realize mamat tu takda lah rabak sgt muka. Aku yg bodoh (mcm la kau cantik sgt, nisa hahaha). Aku rasa tak civilized betul bila fikir balik. Judging someone from the outer appearance, thinking that people should be up to a certain standard to be in my life or even be my life partner. That's utter bullshit. Poyo. Bangang abadi. Who the fuxk do I think I am? Diva. Yeah girls, sila kan terasa. Keep your expectation low. Let your man be himself, help him to become better everyday. 
Mak Ayah kata aku mengarut, mcm rupa tu boleh bg aku happy je. Real woman knows apa lg penting drpd rupa. Jijik betul perangai. Aku dah boleh start berubah dah. Hahaha. 
aku harap dia jumpa wanita cantik dan solehah dan semestinya tak mcm aku yg reject dia :')


2. Pay everything. Mistake :  Aku keluar duit, that's okay. Aku keluar duit setiap kali keluar, that's not right.
Lesson : Aku ada prinsip, tak salah pun aku nak belanja dia apa aku nak belanja. Setakat bayar makan, movie, etc, aku ada duit lebih, aku belanja. Tapi kalau mmg every single freaking time pun aku yang bayar, tu dah lain mcm tu. Vice versa. Kalau dia je bayar pun aku tak suka. Tp kalau kau jenis perempuan yg ada prinsip oh my man has to pay everything, sila kan berambus dr blog ni. Kau kena tahu bila kau kena keluar duit. It's okay to be materialistic because we are all materialistic, but being a do-nothing bitch seems like a humiliation to me. 
Kdg-kdg dlm hidup kau tak boleh kedekut dan demand. Mentang2 kau perempuan, semua kau nak dia bayar. Jadi matang sikit. Dia maybe tgh sesak or ada problem ke. You gotta learn to faham your man's situation. Certain lelaki ni bukan jenis yg cite problem.
 Tapi aku faham ada lelaki yg tak terima duit perempuan, tp tak bermaksud kau boleh pijak dia. Give and take ah. Jgn amek kesempatan dkt dia. Bakal suami kau kot. Bila lagi nak susah bersama? Mungkin nanti kau housewife, takda duit sendiri, harap dkt dia, tp balas lah jasa baik and hard working dia tu dgn make sure duty kau as wife terlaksana. Give and take concept ni luas scope nya.
3. Minat sama/tak sama. Mistake : Got into a fight bcz our preferences were different. Bodoh hahaha, tak reti tolerate masa ni. 
Lesson : Everyone needs their own space for their hobby and preferences. What about you tell him apa kau tak suka, let him tell you what he dislikes. Create situasi and fikir sesuai tak buat camtu.
"ok you suka dota, i know. if i keep calling sbb nk u teman i gi makan can ah?" "can not, i need to focus time dota, later after that can ah"
kau bg dia space nk dota dulu. yg boyfriend nya pun jgn la sakai, dh janji tu teman la, cukup baik dia tk kacau kau dota.
contoh ye contoh.


4. Be listener for each other. Mistake : I thought lelaki tak perlu kan listener, so I ignore what he wanted to talk with me. Like how was his day haha. Lepastu dia silent treatment, aku yg gelabah cane ntah nk pujuk. Stupid. 
Lesson : Kau lelaki or perempuan, always spend time to listen to your partner. Like really listen. Look at them as they talk, make them feel appreciated. Kau tak rasa seronok ke kau tgh mengadu pastu dia tekun je pandang kau, senyum. Kalau kau jarang bertanya dkt dia how was yr day, kau jarang make effort utk really nk dgr cerita dia, Im afraid your love for him/her cuma sekadar syg dkt mulut. You lack of concern for yr partner and that's utterly dangerous. When you assume he's okay, he might not be okay. Ask and listen, tak rugi pun. Aduhai, should a better girlfriend wife lah.

5. Communicate. Mistake :  Aku assume dia tahu, faham, boleh fikir sendiri, common sense konon nya. Semua benda aku assume je. Ended up kena marah, gaduh etc hahaha. Bodoh seh. Assume dia kenal dan faham how common sense adalah benda bodoh please. Pd kau common, pd dia mungkin tak.
Lesson : Girls, lelaki ni jenis bangang. Sekecik-kecik benda kau kena explain elok2 dkt dia. Tp jgn la sampai rendahkan dia. Bakal suami, practice la respect dia. Ewah. Well, Mak kata lelaki yg baik akan allocate masa utk mendengar. Kalau kau taknak explain, kau akan buat dia bingung dan seterusnya bengap. Lepastu kau naik angin. eh, sapa bengap skrg ni? HAHAHA. Jgn assume, girls. Jgn assume dia akan pujuk kau bagai. Cakap.
"you mmg tak reti pujuk i ke? buta eh tak nmpk i merajuk dr bulan lepas?"
HAHAHAHA gittew punya tabah merajuk lama.

iklan

6. Bosan. Mistake :  Aku boleh jd cepat bosan disebabkan oleh byk perkara. Perangai buruk dia etc. So, we broke up.
Lessons : Before kau nak commit to a relationshit, kau boleh tak serious sikit (anisah oiii). Fikir jangka masa panjang please. Aku tau ada orang jenis cepat bosan, byk kali dah aku jumpa, selalu jumpa bila pndg cermin hahaha. Fikir beb, perasaan orang ni benda berat, bukan benda buat main, bukan kau boleh campak baling terajang suka hati. Tak elok kan main dgn perasaan orang. So, get to know him, kalau ada benda kau tak berkenan, ckp dulu, fix dulu. Kalau tak jadi gak, cakap lah kau penat mcm ni. Tapi ingat, know what you dislike and know when how to handle it with him. Relationship bukan rumah atau hotel kau boleh nk check in or out suka hati kau je. Kalau taknak, ckp awal-awal. 

iklan

7. Taknak commitment. Mistake : tiba-tiba aku taknak commitment bercinta tu, malas. penat. letih. muak. tapi aku dh in relationship dh. tp we broke up jugak akhirnya. jijik betul perangai.
Lessons : Alwaysssss approach somebody when you are ready. BILA KAU READY JE PLEASE. Sbb kau tak kan tahu bila org yg kau tgh 'berkawan' tu dah sangkut dkt kau, padahal kau takda rasa pape pun. kalau nak kawan je buat cara nak kawan je. Kalau dah TERsuka (tgk cermin jap), fikir balik, kau nak serious ke apa. buang perasaan tu cepat2 kalau kau tak suka. fikir dia sikit. kesian dkt dia. jgn jadi mcm aku. still rasa kejam. 
tp kalau kau dah tercommit dan taknak pulak commitment tu, ckp elok2. maybe lebih baik kau let go drpd kau buat dia hanging sbb kau dah bosan tp dia still feel the same mcm the 1st day. communication and listening matter.
just dont be like me please people. whatever gender you are hahaha.
8. Dapur. Utk orang suka makan dan suka org yg suka makan mcm aku, aku rasa penting sgt utk aku masuk dapur dan belajar masak. Walaupun aku kalut dkt dapur, tapi efforts tu kena ada. Kena tanam minat tu. Biar lah kena lekeh pun girls. Kau cuba lah slow2. Aku yakin ada lelaki dkt luar sana boleh terima noobs mcm kita k HAHAHAHA takpa aku back up kau. Tapi kau jgn ah malas and sombong nak belajar. Google kan ada. Nanti cari org yg boleh terima effort kau ni k. Sbb sakit hati wooo bila org tak appreciate apa kita cuba buat, masak etc.

9. Kids. i dont like kids. dorang bising, memekak, leceh, comot. hahahaha mcm kau kemas sgt, nisa. but really, the ability to handle kids and their comotness is important, aku tau. kalau syakirah baca ni, dia yg paling fhm mcm mana aku akan jeling budak2 yg bising, mcm dkt zoo negara haritu hahahaha. i kenot ah. aku nk dukung Fateh or anak cousins aku pun duk lari2 mengelat.  alasan "its okay, boyf takda, lama lagi nk kahwin, lepak dulu". sakai. aku patut belajar handle budak sikit. sikit je. lembut kan hati. 
tgk kgkwn aku mcm Ellyna boleh handle baby, aku rasa rendah diri pulak. bila tgk kawan lelaki pandai pgg baby, lagi la beb, tahap boleh tanam muka dkt tanah hahaha. bukan la aku tak suka terus. cuma kalau dorang tgh main dgn Fateh, aku perhati je dkt tepi, diam2 tgk je. gelak senyum setakat cuit pipi Fateh. dulu aku reti, lepastu dah bertahun sgt dah, awkward jadinya.
"bila la aku nak merasa ada anak buah ni.." "nisa, kau lupa ke kau anak sulung?"
hahahaha dem, adik aku kena kahwin dulu pls.
10. Cheating. Mistake : I did it once. I partially regret. He was a douchebag. Nevertheless, cheating shouldnt be my choice masa tu. Cheating is still a bad idea. Jijik perangai sapa yg pernah cheating.
Lesson : if you feel like you have the strongest reason to cheat, confess that to your partner, tell me how that feels like. I bet you dont have the balls. So, cheating is a bad idea, girls n boys. Kalau kau rasa kau mmg fed up sgt dah dgn dia, dont cheat pls. Go ckp dkt dia apa kau tak puas hati, naik suara pun takpa lah drpd kau cheat. Remember the efforts he/she made for you? Kesian dia. Dont follow my steps, guys. Respect your partner. Dont cheat.
"you dgr sini, its been a year i sabar. perangai u ni mcm bangsat sgt tahu? i love you and i need us to fix this. or you want me to cheat on you, find somebody who can be my comforting partner while you're being an asshole here and thinking that im still devoted to you? no, we need to fucking talk, dear. you tknk takpa, tknk ubah perangai pun takpa, one solution, break up. why? bcz im done being devoted to a person who gives no shit and thinks that everything is fine. skrg you nak talk ke tak? bcz the minute i walk out from this place, this ends."
mungkin kau boleh copy ayat aku ni hahahahaha k tak tak, aku penulis so emosi kena ada. lol kau jgn gangster sgt.

11. Duit. Ok ni last ah, sapa baca sampai sini meh sini group hug sikit hahahaha.
Aku rasa bercinta mmg pakai duit. It's either benda tu berbaloi atau pun tak je. Either kau kahwin dgn dia or broke up, lessons tetap ada. Duit tetap jalan. So bagi yg nak bercinta tu, duit ada tak? takda duit, duduk diam2, tgk je org bercinta, berhuhuhu sekali dgn aku meh HAHAHAHA.
-------------------------------- I made this post and this post (click that) sbb this year and last year, a lot have happened in my life. From breaking up with a non-existent boyf, to another one after that and watching my own friends going through heartbreak after heartbreak and some breaking others' hearts also hahahaha.
I broke up with my last boyfriend sbb kan reason no 7 and still feel guilty whenever I see his status keluar dkt fb. I hope he will always do well and will never ended up with a douchebag like me hahahaha. 
It's been 7 months and the longest that I have been sailing solo. Cewah. I think I've had too much of relationships for a 21 y/o hahaha. But the lessons are priceless. I know some of my ex(s) still read my blog. Thank you for the shits we've been through together till the day we broke up, guys. I believe you and I are different now. I hope each of us will settle down with someone sincere enough. Thanks for the lessons.
I've always been inspired and salute gila those yg still tak pernah ada boyf/girlf, power gila doh. Serious.  Thanks for the inspiration still-single friends!
These posts are strictly not a professional advice, these are from my experience and others as well. I really appreciate those who make effort to read and thanked me, love you. muah. Hahahaha. Aku harap jodoh aku tak baca blog ni please. Malu nak mampos ni haa. Aku rasa honest gila post ni. 
Hidup mmg camtu, kau nak cover diri sendiri, tipu diri sendiri, kau yg terperangkap nanti. So, aku honest je lah. Boleh amek iktibar, amek. 
If someday I fall in love and there is someone falls for me, I hope we work at our best to make things happen the right way. I hope I wont be a douchebag anymore, all I need to be is to complete his incompleteness. Maybe it's time to focus on myself and maybe, just maybe, the next one shall be the last one. Kau nak main-main sampai bila, nisa? Pfffftt.

chose this sbb jennifer cantik sgt even time nangis, tu je haha

I forgot how it feels like to have a partner though -_-
God I hope nobody reads until this point. Ok gtg. Ngeeeeee~ Bye!
p/s: topic ni bosan kan? yeahhh. -------------

Thank you for reading! 

Have a nice day! ♥